Some people can be real bitches. And not just a normal, run-of-the-mill bitch, but a raging, over-the-top assh*le. Like the kind of bitch who makes you stop in your tracks and seriously considers kidnapping them, strapping them to a raft, and pushing them out to sea because they’re THAT awful.
You know the people I’m talking about. Your horoscope can tell you all about who they are, too.
While not all of the 12 zodiac signs are known for being bitchy, those that are, really have nasty down to a science. With Cancer, Virgo, Aquarius, and Sagittarius not even making the cut because their sweet souls aren’t made for raging bitch behavior (just little blips of bitch here and there), here are the bitchiest zodiac signs, from most bitchy to least bitchy.
1. SCORPIO (October 23 – November 21)
It should come as no surprise that Scorpio is one of the bitchiest zodiac signs. Scorpio can’t be trusted, are completely ruthless, and once you’re on their bad side, you’re likely to stay there forever. In other words, you never, EVER want to piss off a Scorpio. Instead, just avoid them all together; it’s safer that way.
2. GEMINI (Gemini (May 21 – June 20)
Although fun at first, Gemini can turn on a dime and suddenly you find yourself looking at their evil twin. They’ll say one thing to your face, then say something completely different behind your back. While other signs might be able to recognize when they’re being two-faced, Gemini, in being a twin, just can’t. Pure. Evil.
3. CAPRICORN (December 22 – January 19)
Between being a control freak and cold as ice, it’s hard to know where you stand with a Capricorn. Because of this, it’s best to stand far away from there. If they’re in a mood, you’re doomed. If they’re not in a mood, you should just expect them to be in a mood at any second.
4. ARIES (March 21 – April 19)
Who doesn’t hate the bitch who thinks she’s always right? Demanding and constantly needing to hear the sound of her own voice, Aries is a nightmare person. They love to argue and put people in their place, usually by telling untruths to prove their point. Like I said, Aries is under the delusion that they’re never wrong. *eye roll*
5. LIBRA (September 23 to October 22)
Superficial, shallow, and obsessed with appearance, Libra is the zodiac sign who will ban you from her party if you’re not wearing something of which she approves. Don’t kid yourself: all that harmony and balance comes with a bitch from hell.
6. TAURUS (April 20 – May 20)
Stubborn and bitchy does not a pleasant person make. While Taurus is too ambitious to devote too much time to being bitchy, it’s still there. It’s just hiding underneath their need to succeed, so watch your back. If you’re in their way, they’ll run you over.
7. LEO (July 23 – August 22)
The bitchiness you find in Leo is one that’s more self-involved and egotistical. While they’re not likely to be bitchy to someone else, per se, the fact that they’re their own biggest fan will earn them the label “bitch” anyway.
8. PISCES (February 19 – March 20)
If you can stand passive-aggressive bitchiness, and most of us can, then Pisces’ occasional bad attitude will just roll off your back — after you roll your eyes at them, of course, because they’re still one hell of a bitch.